Uncertain Heart [Open]

[upupatomway]

Soldiers take stock of weapons and ammunition, mechanics are in and out of the armor workshop, all in anticipation of the movement on Vindess that leaders are discussing. Atom had finished reading another magic book and in practice at the target range, he leaves targets quickly fried to a crisp by electricity. He had faced monsters here, he had faced other monsters and robots at home. Logically, he is ready to join the battle.

He had never attacked a human though. At home, it was against the law for a robot to seriously harm or kill a human, even in self-defense. He had always been under the watchful eye of the public as a representative of the robot race, and labeled a hero after saving people from accidents. He delayed the bad humans until the police arrived. There are definitely parallels between the slavery in the Empire and the slavery of robots, but this is a different world with different rules, and he is aware of what participating in battle might mean.

He isn't sure what the right thing to do is.

He decides to seek out someone who might have more battle experience to give him perspective. The Vault has a few possible candidates, but he also makes a point of visiting Flotsam where there are warriors abound. Atom approaches an individual at lunchtime, with a drink or food in hand to offer them.

"Excuse me. Do you have some time to have lunch and talk? I might be assigned to the front in the next battle, and I could use some advice from someone more experienced facing the Imperials." He asks politely.

Comments

[newmemorywhodis]

There's a blank, faintly perplexed look to Link when Atom asks his question. Atom wants Link to talk? With words? Lots of words?

...Has Atom not yet realised that Link's...not really good at that?

But maybe Atom doesn't want Link to talk? Maybe he just wants someone to listen. Link can do that. He's rather good at it, actually.

So he nods. Yes, they can talk. As long as Atom does most of it.

[upupatomway]

Atom knows by now Link isn't super chatty, but he's too experienced not to ask.

He offers Link a drink before starting to explain himself.

"I've been having trouble deciding for sure if I can bring myself to hurt the soldiers or kill them..." He frowns. "I know I volunteered for this cause, and I abhor how the Empire treats people... It reminds me of home. Robots like me once didn't have rights as people, and we still face racism from some humans. But I never had to kill someone to eventually get my rights. In the past, I even kept other robots from harming humans. There are still laws back home that forbid robots from seriously harming humans."

"I realize this is a different world with different laws, but I have a hesitation." He winces to himself.

"I can't afford to hesitate in battle when it might cost the other Corsairs."

[newmemorywhodis]

Link listens closely. Takes a moment to gather his thoughts, figure out what to say. Though he starts by shaking his head in agreement with Atom.

No, Atom can't afford to hesitate. Hesitation means death or injury. For himself, or for someone else.

"...I kill their soldiers because they hurt people," he says. It's blunt, but it's the truth. "They die, or someone else does."

And in the end, Link preferred that they died. In fact, it was his duty as a knight. It was his job to do the dirty work, to get his hands bloody.

[upupatomway]

"I can't help worrying about the cycle of hatred. I've seen it back home continue on, long after a war was supposed to be over..." Atom lowers his head. "What if some of the soldiers are only fighting because they're afraid of disobeying the Emperor? What if the families they leave behind are unable to see that the Emperor was always their real enemy, and in their grief, they blame and hate the Corsairs?"

He grabs at his forehead. "Maybe it's because I'm a robot. But I find it difficult to think of them as the tools of the Emperor instead of as people."

[newmemorywhodis]

Link is silent.

"...They are people," he says. That wasn't something Link ever just forgot, or ignored.

They were people, and they were still enemies that Link had to fight. He couldn't consider if those enemies were indecisive, or had families that would miss them - because in the end, it didn't matter. They were still trying to hurt people that Link wanted to protect.

But that was Link's job. Atom didn't have to do it to.

"You don't have to fight."

[theriflespiral]

Natalia nods. Even if she knows who Atom is, she's not going to turn down a chance to give advice. Especially now, of all times.

"Come then, have seat, though, of course, I have my own biases." She pulls down the collar and scarf she habitually keeps to show the almost entirely faded collar scar.

[upupatomway]

"Is that from an Imperial slave collar?" he asks when she shows him her scar. He counts himself as lucky after being rescued by the Corsairs before he was sent to the mines, or worse, to the science facility base for study. Not everyone's rescue had been so timely.

[theriflespiral]

She nods. "Yes. In this case, let it serve as a reminder: I am not impartial."

She carefully cuts into her ration so as not to waste even the slightest bit of it. "But. You had questions."

[upupatomway]

He nods. "Ms. Natalia, did you fight in a war of some kind before you came to this world?" he starts. She certainly knows how to use her firearms. What she had mentioned in past conversations of her skills and experiences didn't point towards a quiet life of perfecting her aim for sport.

[theriflespiral]

She pauses. Carefully sets her utensils down. "Yes."

She doesn't feel the need to equivocate that, anymore.

1/2

[testygirl]

[ Aira can't control her initial reaction, and it shows starkly on her face. It's disbelief, mostly, but also some contempt for whichever commander thinks Atom belongs on the front lines. The look lasts for a second or two. ]

2/2

[testygirl]

[ Then she sighs and forces her expression to soften—but no, not entirely, because the reassuring smile she tries for still looks tight and a bit unnatural. By now, she's learned that Atom is a robot, and she understands that his combat abilities could be vital for the coming battle. An order is an order, and she can't just tell him not to fight, even if that's the very first thing she wants to blurt out. ]

... Yeah. Yeah, of course. Where do you wanna sit?

[upupatomway]

He leads the way to a table and sets the drinks and food he brought down, taking a seat. "Thanks Aira-neesan. I heard you had joined a few battles already. I've had soldiers chase after me and been a target, but I haven't done much direct fighting against them. Mostly it's been things like setting traps to cut off their advancement or covering a citizen's escape. I'm not completely new to a fight, but I've only ever really fought other robots. At home, robots aren't supposed to seriously harm humans for any reason."

[testygirl]

Aira glances briefly at the food; she was pretty hungry a minute ago, but the subject matter has temporarily robbed her appetite. She ends up holding Atom's eye and listening carefully.

"That makes sense—that you aren't supposed to hurt people, I mean. But it's awful that you were ever targeted in the first place."

She gives him a soft, apologetic look.

"I signed up to fight without really knowing how hard it would be. You just... have to be ready to feel some things, guess. But I'm sure it's different for everyone. I didn't have any real experience fighting other humans going in, same as you."

[upupatomway]

Now that he thinks about it, Aira clearly had been brought along on missions for fighting skills, but that could mean a different experience just as it did for him. Nothing she had said about her home life hinted at a human against human, war torn Japan.

"What kind of enemy are you used to facing?" he asks.

[supersmashbrother]

Atom has good timing, for Raph is hungry like a hippo feeling a bit peckish.

He finds him in the middle of a training routine, finishing up the last of his one-armed pushups. With a grunt, he lifts his body up almost parallel to the floor, swinging himself forward and onto his knees before settling into a seiza position. Here, he gives him his full attention.

"Sure thing, little man. What advice can Raph give to help you out?"

[upupatomway]

Surely of all people Donnie's brother will provide some reliable insights. Atom nearly applauds watching how acrobatic he is, then remembers the topic he's really here for. But first, he should do the polite thing.

Since he was just working out, Atom offers him the bottled drink he had brought. "I don't know if Donnie mentioned me. I'm Atom, a robot from another world. Nice to meet you, Raph."

[supersmashbrother]

"Nice to meet you, too, Atom. Donnie sure knows a lot of people," Raph chuckles, accepting the bottled drink with a nod. "I guess that's a given when you're all on the same team, right?"

It takes less than a second for him to snap the top off of the bottle with his meaty fingers, raising it up and taking a swig. "Mm!" A second swig, and he sets it down with a sigh. "It's also weirdly reassuring that there are others 'round here in a similar predicament. How long have you been here for?"

[upupatomway]

Hearing Raph express that he had similar concerns puts Atom a bit more at ease, though he still isn't quite his cheerful, curious self. "September 2nd, last year I was pulled through the Servant's Gate by the empire. The Corsairs saved me from a ship on the way to the mines on the 5th," he answers. He has been counting the time since he first found out he was in a different world. Some part of him knew it might be of scientific interest later when compared to the time passed at home. Or maybe he was really counting until he could see his family.

"I've helped with measures to block or weaken the empire, and I've learned magic, but I haven't faced the soldiers so directly yet. I know there are probably some who were injured by something I helped to unfold, but the idea of fighting them... Or taking someone's life... It feels different to me." He glances around at the ships of Flotsam. "Have you joined Flotsam on the frontlines yet?"

[supersmashbrother]

He wasn't expecting such a detailed answer. Raph's brow creases as concern colors his expression. "Whoa. That's longer than it should be." He may be botching comfort, checking Atom for any visual signs of distress. "Still! Better to be here with the Corsairs than the mines, right? Otherwise we'd be havin' a very different conversation..."

But he considers the rest of what the boy has to say, nodding as he shares his thoughts with him. "Not yet. When I first got in about two months ago, I helped scout newer areas in the Vault for the overflow of people that joined us recently. Kind of like a front line there, punchin' giant bugs that spit acid at you. Maybe if you squint really hard."

His tone sobers a bit as he looks off to the side, folds his arms inward to nurse the drink in hand. "Where I'm from, as part of the Mad Dogz– I'm used to throwin' myself out front, smashing my way through problems. Fighting bad guys an' saving the day is our thing." Forgetting the drink in the next second, he lightly pounds his drink-laden hand into the other, spilling some of its contents. He then looks back at Atom with a slight frown. "From what Raph has seen so far, this world really upped the ante in terms of violence. But he's seen it in his own world, too. It makes for tougher decisions all around."

[redprayer]

"Advice...?"

Rezo is, as usual, keeping himself busy with work at the clinic. It's probably a good thing Atom approached, or else he might have skipped lunch.

Hearing that Atom might be assigned to the front is a bit of a shock, and Rezo reminds himself that despite how young Atom seems for that kind of work, he's not human.

Being human doesn't seem to be a prerequisite for uncertainty, however, and Rezo gently smiles. "Of course I have time. Shall we step outside?"

[upupatomway]

"Yes, if you don't mind," Atom agrees. Humans always say fresh air helps with stress and he's willing to give it a chance. He also prefers some amount of privacy for this conversation. As much as he's speaking to Mr. Rezo, who he only knows oh so well, he's still filled with mixed emotions, including a degree of embarrassment. He isn't sure how someone experienced in war or slaying enemies will react to his questions.

Once they're outside, Atom has a look around to confirm nobody is lurking very close, then he turns to Rezo. "Thanks Mr. Rezo. I've been thinking a lot about this topic, and I want to be ready for when I need to face the soldiers directly. I've only contributed in less direct ways like setting traps and collapsing tunnels. I have fought others before, at home, but those were other robots. Where I'm from, there are laws that say robots aren't supposed to seriously harm humans for any reason. So it's not exactly my first time fighting, but..."

[redprayer]

Rezo's used to people seeking him out for advice, so his demeanour remains calm, even affable as they find a relatively private spot and settle down. He wonders briefly if Atom is looking for more guidance when it comes to magic usage, but instead it seems like Atom's concerns are more... philosophical?

"Are you afraid you will be unable to do it?" he asks.

(Robots aren't allowed to harm humans- Rezo wonders if the reverse is true. He suspects not.)

[upupatomway]

He nods his head, looking clearly troubled. "Precisely," he answers. Despite getting straight to the point, he doesn't feel any real relief after the emotional build-up of starting the conversation. So it was with these kind of conversations.

"At home, I'm normally considered a representative for robotkind and a peacekeeper. I don't know that I could ever join a rebellion group there, and I've even stood between robots and humans who opposed each other, doing everything I could to prevent them from attacking or hurting someone in the crossfire. I always held out hope that we could find a peaceful way to resolve the ways robots had been mistreated by humans. And finally, several years ago, we were given our rights through international law. But now I..." He cuts himself off, distracted for a moment by a mix of overwhelming emotions.

"Now I'm here, in this world, being asked to join this fight."

[redprayer]

Well, clearly Atom isn't a stranger to responsibility. Rezo's eyebrows lift in a brief, minute expression of surprise before he begins properly pondering what Atom told him.

"Have you ever wanted to harm anyone?" he asks after a few moments. "You say that robots like yourself were mistreated by humans. Did that ever make you angry?"

It's perhaps a question he asks more out of curiosity than anything else, but it does tie into Atom's concerns about if he'll be able to fight at all.