Uncertain Heart [Open]

[upupatomway]

Soldiers take stock of weapons and ammunition, mechanics are in and out of the armor workshop, all in anticipation of the movement on Vindess that leaders are discussing. Atom had finished reading another magic book and in practice at the target range, he leaves targets quickly fried to a crisp by electricity. He had faced monsters here, he had faced other monsters and robots at home. Logically, he is ready to join the battle.

He had never attacked a human though. At home, it was against the law for a robot to seriously harm or kill a human, even in self-defense. He had always been under the watchful eye of the public as a representative of the robot race, and labeled a hero after saving people from accidents. He delayed the bad humans until the police arrived. There are definitely parallels between the slavery in the Empire and the slavery of robots, but this is a different world with different rules, and he is aware of what participating in battle might mean.

He isn't sure what the right thing to do is.

He decides to seek out someone who might have more battle experience to give him perspective. The Vault has a few possible candidates, but he also makes a point of visiting Flotsam where there are warriors abound. Atom approaches an individual at lunchtime, with a drink or food in hand to offer them.

"Excuse me. Do you have some time to have lunch and talk? I might be assigned to the front in the next battle, and I could use some advice from someone more experienced facing the Imperials." He asks politely.

Comments

[newmemorywhodis]

There's a blank, faintly perplexed look to Link when Atom asks his question. Atom wants Link to talk? With words? Lots of words?

...Has Atom not yet realised that Link's...not really good at that?

But maybe Atom doesn't want Link to talk? Maybe he just wants someone to listen. Link can do that. He's rather good at it, actually.

So he nods. Yes, they can talk. As long as Atom does most of it.

[upupatomway]

Atom knows by now Link isn't super chatty, but he's too experienced not to ask.

He offers Link a drink before starting to explain himself.

"I've been having trouble deciding for sure if I can bring myself to hurt the soldiers or kill them..." He frowns. "I know I volunteered for this cause, and I abhor how the Empire treats people... It reminds me of home. Robots like me once didn't have rights as people, and we still face racism from some humans. But I never had to kill someone to eventually get my rights. In the past, I even kept other robots from harming humans. There are still laws back home that forbid robots from seriously harming humans."

"I realize this is a different world with different laws, but I have a hesitation." He winces to himself.

"I can't afford to hesitate in battle when it might cost the other Corsairs."

[newmemorywhodis]

Link listens closely. Takes a moment to gather his thoughts, figure out what to say. Though he starts by shaking his head in agreement with Atom.

No, Atom can't afford to hesitate. Hesitation means death or injury. For himself, or for someone else.

"...I kill their soldiers because they hurt people," he says. It's blunt, but it's the truth. "They die, or someone else does."

And in the end, Link preferred that they died. In fact, it was his duty as a knight. It was his job to do the dirty work, to get his hands bloody.

[upupatomway]

"I can't help worrying about the cycle of hatred. I've seen it back home continue on, long after a war was supposed to be over..." Atom lowers his head. "What if some of the soldiers are only fighting because they're afraid of disobeying the Emperor? What if the families they leave behind are unable to see that the Emperor was always their real enemy, and in their grief, they blame and hate the Corsairs?"

He grabs at his forehead. "Maybe it's because I'm a robot. But I find it difficult to think of them as the tools of the Emperor instead of as people."

[newmemorywhodis]

Link is silent.

"...They are people," he says. That wasn't something Link ever just forgot, or ignored.

They were people, and they were still enemies that Link had to fight. He couldn't consider if those enemies were indecisive, or had families that would miss them - because in the end, it didn't matter. They were still trying to hurt people that Link wanted to protect.

But that was Link's job. Atom didn't have to do it to.

"You don't have to fight."

[upupatomway]

No doubt for someone who had already killed the fact the enemy army were people would be an even heavier burden. Atom already looks up to Link, but he admires him more for being able to acknowledge that truth. He gives him a solemn nod.

"I don't know if it would be right for me to walk away. I have abilities that would help, that might even spare lives. I just reached a higher level of lightning magic, and I've been asked to join the next battle. Apparently, me being a robot might make me the right person to face the enemy in Vindess specifically. I know logically, my participation will likely do more good for our cause than harm to innocents. But I feel... Mixed up inside. Confused. Perhaps it's selfish, but I have many questions about what it would change about me."

[newmemorywhodis]

Link hums as he thinks. Perhaps it is selfish to be worried about such a think; certainly, Link would think himself selfish if he had ever considered shirking his duty. But that was a standard that Link only ever held himself to. It wasn't one he would hold Atom or anyone else to.

"Changes some things," he says. "Not others." Link hadn't really changed after he first killed another person. His personality and who he was as a person had remained largely the same. Other events and influences had more effect on him in that regard. But there was definitely a weight that came with delivering death. A weight he'd chosen to bear.

"What can you live with?"

Because in the end, that was what mattered, wasn't it? What could Atom live with.

[upupatomway]

It's a simple question, but it seems to lead straight to the root of the issue. What were his hesitations? What were his motives? Which carried the weight that he could live with it in spite of the other?

"If I kill someone, I don't know if I can go home and still be the good representative of robots or the helpful protector people have relied on me to be. I'll be one of the few robots who have committed the crime of killing. The people who love me would be upset. It... might make me a hypocrite too. Because I stood in the way of a robot rebellion turning violent. I even physically restrained their leader. I insisted robots and humans were meant to be friends, and that we had to push for the laws to change."

Recent events at home had only mixed up his feelings more about those events. Atom grimaces at the thought of the flip side, at the horrors he knew were happening in the present.

"But I can't just watch the Empire hurt people and treat them like property. Nobody can ban slavery here except the Emperor. And he'll never give up that power, will he?"

[newmemorywhodis]

Link shakes his head. No, the chances of the Emperor giving up such power was not practically laughable. Some enemies simply could not be reasoned with; to attempt to do so would only bring pain.

Still, something Atom said has Link frowning faintly.

"...Robot rebellion?" Robots in Atom's wanted to rebel? And...had just cause to do so?

[upupatomway]

"Yes. The first robots were machines without minds. They were advanced tools to help humans with their work. But a few decades ago, the first robot with a consciousness was built, and soon there were millions of us with minds and feelings of our own. Despite humans knowing we had minds, many were slow to see us as more than the tools robots started as. They wanted to keep us as property for the same kind of reasons the Empire keeps slaves. That's why the slavery here was the first reason I wanted to join the Corsairs," he explains. The transport the Corsairs had liberated him from had been a familiar sight of people stuffed inside, scared to find out where they were being shipped to and who they would have to answer to.

"Many humans were kind towards us from the beginning and saw us as people; in that way, robots had it easier than a lot of the slaves here. But some humans were cruel, and the way they harmed the robots they owned naturally led to the urge to fight back.

Blue Knight was a robot who called himself a liberator for robotkind. We were allies in the effort to free robots from criminals who had kidnapped them and cruel owners. He became the leader of that rebellion. But he wanted to start a war against the humans, whereas I wanted to fight for our rights without attacking anyone."

[newmemorywhodis]

"...Robots were slaves?"

Suddenly, he's thinking of the zonai constructs. They didn't seem quite like Atom. Not as intelligent, more limited in their roles. But did that make them unfeeling, non-sentient creatures? And if they weren't...were they like slaves too?

It wasn't something he'd ever thought about before. The constructs had been ancient and unfamiliar. And he'd been very busy with other things.

Now, he's wondering if maybe it's something he should talk to Zelda about. One day, if...when he gets home.

[upupatomway]

Atom nods his head, eyes cast downward. "We could be sold, replaced, damaged, or destroyed at the whims of our owners. Like any other kind of tool."

"Blue Knight's anger was justified. We just couldn't agree over how to best gain our rights as people. I relied on the humans who were allies to us to push for the laws to change. He didn't believe humans could be trusted to make good on their word. He wanted faster results by force. I wanted to protest peacefully and avoid giving humans a reason to fear us. In the end, he was the first robot to kill a human."

[newmemorywhodis]

Link is silent for a moment.

"...Are robots free now?"

Did the rebellion work? Or Atom's push for legal change? Or would Atom return to a world where he wasn't free, when all of this was over?

[upupatomway]

Atom smiles, not as brightly as usual, but he gives an assuring nod. "Yes. International law now establishes that we are people instead of property. Most countries follow these laws and the rest are under pressure to change. Some robots have fled to where their rights are acknowledged. It isn't a perfect world; there are still groups that want to change things back and people who don't respect us, but it keeps improving.

I know it's possible, which gives me hope for this world too."

[newmemorywhodis]

Link nods; that's good. Even if there's still work to do, he's glad that Atom won't return to a world that still classes him as property.

"How did it happen?" Because that was the question, wasn't it? How do you win freedom. In this way, Atom has more experience that Link; he's fought and won against the forces of darkness and ruin, but not against his own oppressor.

[upupatomway]

"It took large numbers of both humans and robots. The human population demanded it from their leaders, the scientists who built us spoke up, and a lot of robots had done things that left an undeniable good mark on society." Atom might have become a particularly famous face, but there were many more robots in fields like medicine who shifted views with their actions.

Essentially, Atom's approach, believing in a friendship between species, was what had worked instead of the violent one. The thought didn't come to his mind though. Blue Knight's fall had been wrapped in tragedy and controversy, and cost an ally and would be friend. Being correct in the end wasn't a 'victory.'

Atom crosses his arms. "The international allyship that granted our rights worked very differently from the Empire though. While they have a leader, that person is more of a representative of the group than the one telling them what to do. In reality, all member nations have a voice. It's not a perfect system in every way, but it isn't at the whim of a single individual. In many ways, the Corsairs are the population coming together to demand change. But there's only an Emperor at the top."

[newmemorywhodis]

"You had allies in power."

And that was the difference, wasn't it? A good ruler would listen to their subjects. Take heed of their concerns, their worries, their fears. Use their power to make things better.

The Emperor was not a good ruler. Neither were any of the other Imperials or people in power. They didn't listen to the people below them; only their own selfish wants and desires.

And power could not be taken from people unwilling to share it without the use of force.

[upupatomway]

"Yes..." Atom says softly, raising a fist to press against his mouth, thinking about the two different situations, and then a third.

"There was a war between nations at home a few years ago that removed a cruel dictator, but it was not entirely justified. It was based on the fear of other nations and mere rumors, rather than the desires of the citizens of that nation or the goal to establish a fair government. Little care was taken to protect the civilians from the crossfire. When I was sent there with a peace envoy, more than anything I saw innocent people suffering." His eyes wander upward.

"But this war feels different. It was started by the people who live under the thumb of the Emperor... And if there are no allies in power, I can't think of another way to remove the Emperor..." His brow wrinkles and he grabs at his forehead, frustrated by the bitter truth. "And if Mr. Matthias is correct- and he has proven his power is real- this isn't merely a fight for the civilians. The Empire is killing this world. Everyone is in danger."

[newmemorywhodis]

Link nods. Yes; this was is different. Everyone is in danger.

But he doesn't say anything. Link knows where he stands, and he's comfortable with that. But's not for him to try and convince Atom of anything. Atom's the only one who can decide if those reasons are enough for him to fight.

If they're enough for him to kill.

But Link will look at Atom, and wait for him to make his own decisions.

[upupatomway]

He knows Link isn't one for many words, but his simple nod reassures him that he isn't mistaken in what he was made to understand from the warning from Hades. Atom had put his life on the line for less, and was willing to sacrifice himself if it meant saving his own world. He didn't want to abandon this one to a terrible fate either.

He doesn't truly breathe for oxygen, but Atom closes his eyes and draws in a deep breath. His logic says some type of action must be taken. And his emotions are the familiar mix of dread and a great determination he has felt before. He opens his eyes, expression determined but tinged with sorrow.

"I want to help. I won't kill when it isn't called for, but I want to stop Gaurus and the other Imperial leaders that make this Empire the terrible place that it is. I will keep looking for other choices, but if death is truly the only thing that can stop them, I'll have to learn to accept it."

[newmemorywhodis]

Link nods. Now at least, Atom has reaches his conclusion. He knows his path forward. It's a difficult path, one that won't be easily to walk. But it's better to know the path, and walk it anyway, than to wander off and on.

"Then you know what to do."